Where have all the interesting characters in football gone?

Strange times when you find yourself agreeing with a well-worn cliché, but there simply aren’t the characters in the game anymore. What other explanations can there possibly be for television’s continued obsession with John Burridge? Over the past 12 months he has been beamed into living rooms, firstly in the Tyne Tees region, then nationwide, sporting comedy sideburns, singing, asking Fabrizio Ravanelli if he liked fish and chips and, more recently, embracing his old mum on Match of the Day.

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Wednesday 1 In the Champions League Man Utd recover from conceding a goal in the first minute to beat Juventus 3-2 at Old Trafford. "This is a measure of how far we've come," says Alex beaming fit to burst. "If we put another three goals past Peruzzi in Rome next week we will be on our way to the World Cup finals," says Phil Neville, getting carried away. Newcastle come back from two down in Kiev to draw with two late goals, the second a bizarre deflection. Their luck is offset, though, by an injury to Tino Asprilla which will keep him out for at least a month. In the Coke, Sheffield Wed go out to Grimsby on a 4-3 aggregate. "It was another bad night at the office," says David Pleat, who may not be working late for much longer.

Thursday 2 Bad news for bar staff around Manchester – Roy Keane's cruciate injury will keep him out for the rest of the season.

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Sweden have underachieved ever since the last World Cup, says Duncan Cooper

June 16th 1997 – the rainiest day of the year at Arlandastad golf course near Stockholm Airport. I stagger off the 18th green, wet through, and trudge slowly up to the clubhouse. Near the first tee a man with blond hair is struggling to put his waterproof trousers on. One foot seems to be stuck. He’s slightly podgy, unshaven, and generally rather grumpy

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Phil Town analyses one of the biggest absentees from the upcoming World Cup

C’est fini blubbed the sports daily A Bola. And so it was. Perennial under-achievers Portugal had once again managed to snatch bitter failure from the jaws of certain success. They had been drawn in what seemed on the face of it an eminently accessible group. Second place at least looked a formality behind Germany but ahead of apparent pushovers Ukraine, Armenia, Albania and Northern Ireland. But a weak start against the first two, dropping five points from a possible six, made qualification an uphill struggle from the outset, and the Portuguese were left depending on third party favours which never materialized.

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Simon Evans explains why the Champions League is the place to make money

There was a time when English fans dreamed of foreign investors, mystery millionaire Arab businessmen or an American caught by the soccer bug, pumping millions into their club. Today Walker, Hall, Harding, Gibson et al have removed the need for the foreign fantasy. But over here in Europe’s poorer half, there are few local heroes capable of turning a club’s fortunes around and delivering the dream and it is here that the romantic ideal of the outsider with his pot of cash is thriving – and believe it or not it is Englishmen they are dreaming of.

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