The Archive

England’s draw in Israel met with predictable catcalls, but was it as bad as the papers and fans made out? Jonathan Wilson believes Steve McClaren was short of luck as well as ideas in an awkward fixture

Were England really so bad in Israel? Given that they largely outplayed a side that had gone seven years unbeaten at home before losing to Croatia in October, it could be argued that they actually did rather well. After a nervous opening 20 minutes or so, they never looked like losing, Jamie Carragher hit the bar, Frank Lampard glanced an effort a fraction wide, Andy Johnson fluffed a great headed chance and Dudu Aouate, the Israel keeper, made three useful saves. Presented with the same opportunities, another team on another night would have won comfortably.

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England’s trip to Tel Aviv was for the most part peaceful, though some in Israel were unhappy not at the excesses of some fans but what was seen as the do-gooding of others, as Shaul Adar explains

With England coming to Israel for the first competitive meeting of the teams, one might expect media coverage revolving around Steven Gerrard, Wayne Rooney and the rest of the star names. After three days in Israel there was one Englishman who stole the limelight from the players, although nobody can remember his name. He was an England fan, bearded, obese, shirtless and sunburned, with a tattoo of Preston North End. Israelis queued for a photo with him and he appeared on TV and in all the papers, usually doing his party trick – licking his own nipple. His soundbites were rather repetitive, like the questions. “I had X beers so far today.” Or, “I went to a whore house in Tel Aviv, a whore house in Jerusalem and I’m looking for a whore house in Nazareth.” He was the star but by no means alone – the crew of a respectable TV magazine show took some fans to a strip club in search of the same story.

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A recent documentary film claims to reveal the dynamics of a German dressing room – that of the national team at the World Cup. But Matt Nation has witnessed a very different side to coaching techniques at a lower level

Rarely has a U-rated film in Germany been as scandal-soaked as Söhnke Wortmann’s Deutschland. Ein Sommermärchen (Germany: A Summer’s Fairytale), the fly-on-the-wall documentary about Germany’s World Cup campaign. It revealed more false bonhomie in the German dressing room than at a ­civil‑service office Christmas party. It demonstrated how David Odonkor makes just as much sense when interviewed with a mouthful of toothpaste as without. It exposed young men in sickening states of undress, including flip-flops and towelling socks together. But, most of all, it gave Jürgen Klinsmann the chance to add to his motley collection of alter-egos, in this case as Motivationsmeister.

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Over recent years these clubs have faced each other many times but never at such levels of comfort as this meeting, both on and off the pitch. Did the game itself reflect current contentment? Roger Titford went along to find out

Reading’s first season in the Premiership has been a sweet dream so far. Back in October we did a double-take as Sky announced “three big games for you this weekend: Man United v Liverpool, Reading v Arsenal and Real Madrid v Barcelona”. It’s amazing how quickly you get used to the attention and by February the blandishments of the broadsheets had become commonplace. Europe, rather than relegation, was our struggle. Premiership foes, who looked so big, fast and fit in early autumn, had shrunk in the face of our sustained teamwork and intelligence. We could even travel to the Emirates in hope.

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According to the Spanish football authorities, no cup competitions took place between 1936 and 1939. This claim is contested fiercely in one half of Valencia. Andy Brassell reports

Age doesn’t always guarantee respect. Levante, founded in 1909 and pointedly named after the entire region rather than just the city, are the older of the two Valencia clubs by nine years. Their history, however, is dominated by lower-division drudgery and the current season is only their fourth ever in La Primera. They are largely noted solely for Johan Cruyff’s short – and incongruous – spell in their colours in 1981, and for being coached by one of Spain’s more controversial imports, the spiky Bernd Schuster, during their last spell in the top flight.

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