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The last broadcast

Steve Menary describes the row ensuing between British and French broadcasters over Manchester United’s Champions League tie against Marseille

Anyone hoping to listen to the second leg of Manchester United’s Champions League tie with Olympique de Marseille on French radio is in for a disappointment. In a dispute that perhaps says a lot about the Premier League’s unwritten policy of never knowingly being undersold, French radio broadcasters plan to boycott the March 15 game at Old Trafford 
en masse.

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Sweet Carroll nine

Cameron Carter describes the month’s football coverage, including Lineker crying wolf, a terrible pun and Arsenal v Barcelona

Mel Brooks does a turn about an old man at a Jewish wedding launching into Strangers in the Night but starting too high, so that his voice breaks into a whispered scream trying to hit the high note in the chorus. Gary Lineker got himself into a similar predicament on February 5 as a result of his repeated use of hyperbole when introducing Match of the Day.

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Paying the way

Niall Quinn has criticised supporters for illegally watching their teams play on televsion rather than in the stands

Sunderland chairman Niall Quinn said that his claim to “despise” fans who watch matches in pubs was meant to start a debate on falling attendances. But, while every detail of Arsenal against Barcelona was minutely scrutinised, Quinn’s comments received minimal press coverage.

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Burning bridges

With no hope of domestic glory, Chelsea manager Carlo Ancelotti is hoping Champions League success can save his job

When Ashley Cole missed his penalty against Everton in their FA Cup tie, the Arsenal goalkeeper Wojciech Szczesny asked on Twitter: “What do you think Ashley was aiming for? Is it an aeroplane? No, it’s just Ashley throwing Chelsea out of the FA Cup.” In fairness to Cole, it wasn’t the most misguided shot he took this month.

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The mood of change

With uprisings across the Arab world dominating the world press, can change be sparked in football’s most powerful regime?

The popular uprisings in the Middle East are now receiving more coverage than football in the UK press. Even the Arsenal v Barcelona Champions League tie, apparently regarded by some pundits as the most momentous event in the history of the game, couldn’t keep the revolution in Libya off the front pages. So it’s surprising that no one has yet asked the keen Tweeter Jay Bothroyd for his views on the implosion of the Gaddafi regime.

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