Saturday 1 A ten-point lead for Man Utd who thrash West Ham 7-1 – “It was one of those days when everything went right,” says Sir Alex – while Big Dave’s babies lose for the third time in four games, 1-0 to Chelsea. Michael Owen’s tufty hair receives plenty of ruffling as he scores two in a 3-0 win at Coventry that takes Liverpool to within a point of Leeds. Southampton and Wimbledon both lose but Bradford fail to take advantage, beaten 2-0 at Newcastle. Watford still need eight points to avoid the worst ever Premiership total, their defensive frailties highlighted at Goodison Park, where even Mark Hughes manages to score in Everton’s 4-2 win. There’s violence in Birmingham, where home fans clash with Wolves supporters before their game at St Andrews, and in Bristol, with Stoke goalkeeper Kevin Ward attacked on the pitch by three Rovers fans at the end of the teams’ 3-3 draw. Trapdoor teasers Chester win again, 1-0 at Halifax, and draw level on points with fast sliding Shrewsbury. Hamilton’s match at Stenhousemuir in the Scottish Second Division is called off when the visiting team’s players go on strike over unpaid wages.
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Stories
Tuesday 2 Man Utd finish top of their Champions League group with a 2-1 win over Sturm Graz. "The competition will be more exciting for everyone from now on," yawns Alex. Arsenal's magnificently meaningless last group game ends in a 3-2 win in Stockholm. The FA are to take no action against Neil Ruddock over garlic-related remarks allegedly made to Patrick Vieira. "We fully accept that he is not racist ñ as his many black friends in the game will testify," says one of those FA spokesmen. Charlton regain second spot in the First Division after winning at Crewe. Moneybags Wigan, still unbeaten, go top of the Second by beating Chesterfield. Another bad day at the office for Barry Hearn as Leyton Orient slip to the bottom of the Third after losing at Darlington while rivals Chester win at Shrewsbury. Exciting times ahead in the Potteries, possibly, as Stoke City are bought by a consortium of Icelandic businessmen.
Sunday 1 Tony Banks joins the Kate Hoey row: "If they go back in the FA Cup then that would be bloody disastrous. This sacrifice is worth paying even if it is unpopular with a number of politicians." Arsenal beat Man Utd 2-1 in the Charity Shield, Ray Parlour scoring the winner. Nicolas Anelka does not turn up to cheer on his old mates.
Updates from clubs in trouble including Chester City and Oxford United
Among the plausible candidates for this season’s spectacular calamity club are Chester City, where Kevin Ratcliffe’s resignation as manager after the first three games of the season has severely dented any optimism generated when Terry Smith, the former coach of the Great Britain gridiron team, took control of the club in July. Understandably, given the mess left by the previous administration, City fans have so far been prepared to give Smith the benefit of the doubt, despite his “colourful” past on the UK ice hockey and gridiron scene.
Mark Howell on his boyhood club as they face an uphill task to survive
My home town team is Chester City. In their 113-year history they have been to the semi-finals of the League Cup, won promotion three times and won the Debenhams Cup once. That is it. We are one of those teams who have never played at Wembley. We are also two months or so away from extinction.