Saturday June 24
Germany 2 Sweden 0
“Even when they’re supposed to be rubbish, they’re good,” says Gary Lineker after a first half dominated by Germany, who lead by two early goals from Podolski. Sweden are failing to close down opponents, picking the wrong pass and exchanging shrugs. Worse still they’re offending Mark Bright: “Basics… absolute basics.” Lucic gets a second yellow for a shirt tug in the middle of the pitch; Mr Simon of Brazil, having been cajoled into taking action by German protests, produces a sickly smirk while holding up the red. Lehmann doesn’t look at all secure during rare attacks but he’s not made to work by Larsson’s poor penalty, skied into the stands. Germany look for more: Schneider’s deflected shot comes off the post, Isaksson beats out an effort from Neuville. A German supporter is waving a model of the World Cup. “A bit premature,” sniffs Stuart Pearce.
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Stories
Friday June 9
Possibly because Barry Davies, the last man who could take these things seriously, is missing, the BBC only show highlights of the opening ceremony. It includes lots of men in lederhosen, some ringing large cowbells attached to the waistbands of their shorts in a vigorous and vaguely pornographic manner. There’s a parade of former World Cup-winning stars, including what Jonathan Pearce describes as “The legend that is Italy”. “Ricky Villa – still tall,” gurgles Pearce later. Pelé arrives with the trophy, but brandishes it like he’s just won it, followed by Claudia Schiffer with Sepp Blatter in tow, sporting luxuriant sideburns that give him the look of Ben Cartwright from Bonanza.
Sunday 1 The SPL title may have been decided at Tynecastle, where Hearts go two up against Celtic but lose 3‑2 to two goals in the last three minutes. Celtic take a seven-point lead. Lincoln manager Keith Alexander is sent “on leave” by the club, who are 15th in League Two.
Not all ex-Sunderland bosses are unemployable. Burnley fan Kevin Clarke looks at the amazing success of Steve Cotterill
Pundits often express disappointment at the lack of young English managers flourishing and the fact that top clubs appoint foreign coaches with the rest of the jobs swallowed up by the same old names. In Burnley, however, a quiet revolution is taking place, spearheaded by a man whose public stock was very low before this season. Step forward Steve Cotterill.
Saturday 2 Arsenal rampage past Charlton, 4-0 at Highbury. “He’s the most exciting player anywhere,” says Alan Curbishley of two-goal Thierry. Everton’s good run comes to an end with a 1-0 defeat to Spurs in a bad-tempered game highlighted by Jamie Redknapp’s clogging of Tim Cahill, which may be referred to the FA. “It was a momentous effort,” says Gary Megson, surrounded by streamers and popping corks, as West Brom win a match, beating Bolton 2-1. Wigan top the Championship once more by beating Rotherham 2-0 while Reading are held at home by Burnley. QPR go third by winning at Stoke, but Tony Pulis claims Marc Bircham play-acted to get Gerry Taggart sent off: “Taggart’s a tough warrior. He’s incensed.” “If the fans want me to go then they will keep doing what they have been doing,” says Leicester’s Micky Adams, who is barracked during a 1-1 home draw with Preston. In League One the Arsenal of Bedfordshire drop points for only the second time in a 1-1 draw at Tranmere, who score with a rebound from a twice-taken penalty. Brentford are nine points back in second after beating Oldham. Yeovil top League Two again, but only three points separate the top seven. Kidderminster blow a chance to get off the foot by letting in a 90th-minute equaliser to next-to-bottom Cambridge. Paul Gascoigne is to leave Boston after two months; Scottish club Morton are said to be mustard-keen to offer him their manager’s job. Why, Morton?