The Archive

Footballers keep doing things that bother Matt Nation, but in the long term they'll thank him for pointing it out

In an attempt to outline just how difficult it is to be a footballer, Brian Clough once drew parallels between the respective lots of a cameraman and a centre forward. The cameraman, he reckoned, could spend an age perfecting his angles, positions and profiles, but then see the whole lot disappear down the toilet as a result of somebody deliberately knocking everything over just as he reaches for his clapperboard. Similarly, Cloughie’s number nine could spend an equal amount of time perfecting his shooting position (particularly if the number nine in question is Justin Fashanu) and then be brought down in one fell swoop by a carefully-aimed kick to the Achilles tendon.

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The odd detractor (they're always odd) occasionally accuses WSC of devoting too much space to articles about obscure countries such as Outer Mongolia. This one's for them. Charles Philpott takes up the story

No account of Mongolia would be complete without a reference to Ghengis Khan. There, it’s out of the way now. For, when talking Mongolian football, there will be no story of Mongol hordes emerging out of the East to take the football world by storm, no parallels to the exploits of the Great Khan.

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Dear WSC
As one of the few people in Scotland, outside of Glasgow, still supporting my own club I feel I must display a hopeless bias against Rangers.It is about time they played in England, as I for one have had enough of them ruining Scotland’s reputation in Europe. As a country we are seen as having limited success with even more limited resources, but every year Rangers go out and make Europe think Scotland are shit. Having seen Hearts lose on away goals to Red Star Belgrade (who were one of the best teams in Europe a few years ago), Aberdeen go out after putting up a good fight (visits to Wales excepted) and Celtic not exactly disgrace the whole nation, we must watch Rangers get stuffed by any team that fancies a go, except Alania Vladikavkaz. Rangers were beaten by Juventus, Ajax, Auxerre and Grasshoppers of Zurich along with another few teams I can’t be bothered naming. Add this to their stunning 1-0 aggregate victory over the champions of Cyprus two years ago and it becomes obvious that Rangers lack the fighting spirit displayed by the Scots in Europe (remember Motherwell v Dortmund?).Secondly, what is this assumption that Rangers would automatically join the Premiership? Any team that plays Richard Gough, Stuart McCall, Erik Bo Anderson and Peter Van Vossen on a regular basis should be playing in the Second Division at best.
Graham DR Lee, Heriot-Watt University

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Friday 1 Brian Laws is sacked as Grimsby manager, the writing having gone up on the wall in large, luminous capitals after his side's last match, a 3-0 home defeat to bottom-placed Oldham earlier in the week. Paul Gascoigne is included in the England squad for the match in Georgia, with Glenn Hoddle using a variety of means to justify his decision including religious faith: "One of the big teachings of Christianity is that of forgiveness – I hope that in not casting him aside I have given him a chance to change," and abject bullshit: "Had I not picked him at this stage then I feel it would have been detrimental to him and his family in the long run."

Saturday 2 Man Utd are getting careless: now they lose their 35-match unbeaten home record in the Premiership, going down 2-1 to Chelsea. "I know the thread of what is wrong and so do the players," says Alex Ferguson. Word is that it's something to do with letting in more goals than you score. Arsenal stay top after a heated, injury-strewn draw at Wimbledon, who didn't impress Arsène Wenger: "Today they deliberately avoided playing football and for our defenders it was a heading session." Forest's slide continues with a 2-0 defeat at Villa, which leaves them firmly anchored in the bottom three with Frank Clark admitting that his days could be numbered: "I need some wins under my belt before the takeover, otherwise someone else will be spending the money." In Scotland, Celtic go top after beating Aberdeen while Rangers can only draw at Raith.

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Following Wales' 7-1 drubbing at the hands of Holland, Cris Freddi looks back at the heaviest defeats suffered by the British and Irish in Europe

The Welsh might take a few crumbs from knowing a) they weren’t alone in conceding seven in a game against the Europeans, and b) the English were the first. After the historic 6-3 home defeat by Hungary in 1953, Billy Wright and boys must have travelled to Budapest in some trepidation, though you wouldn’t have known it from listening to Stanley Rous, who said simply “We will win”.

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