When the fish brings the glove. That’s what they say in New Caledonia when they can’t be specific about a time or date. For example: “When will my opal-studded headdress be ready?” “Well, when the fish brings the glove – you know how these things are.” Or it can also be used to express something improbable: “Do you think they’ll discuss Logical Positivism in the Big Brother garden tonight?” “Yeah, when the fish brings the glove.”

It is thought that the phrase originated here because someone saw a fish with a glove once, but no one believed him and the phenomenon has not been witnessed since. Horizon Sport are a small club formed by an unambitious but enthusiastic collective who believed they would only win silverware “when the fish brought the glove”. The saying doesn’t really translate very well to other countries, but, to be honest, when you’re living on an island this deep into the South Pacific, it isn’t that important to make sense. Cameron Carter

Related articles

Badge of the week ~ Buxton United SC, Guyana
Buxton United were founded by three blues musicians who chose for their new club an image that appeared in many of their songs. "Trainspotter" Jim...
Badge of the week ~ Helmond Sport, Netherlands
Helmond Sport’s badge serves as a kind of Rorschach Test for all those who come upon it for the first time. Helmond is an area of the...
Badge of the week ~ Sierra Leone
Sierra Leone’s FA were quite clear what they wanted two specific things for the national team’s badge. Firstly, something that said,...