Search: ' Scott Parker'

The Soccer Saturday pundits enjoy a bundle at Reading. Simon Tyers enjoyed watching them

How joyous the sight of men on live TV completely losing their composure. Phil Thompson was allocated Reading v Sheffield United on January 20’s Soccer Saturday, so got to relay unfolding events as Keith Gillespie and Wally Downes – who, it transpired from the highlights, had chosen the moment to push Neil Warnock at which he would least have expected it – took the game a sufficient distance from repute. Thompson’s and Jeff Stelling’s harmonic shocked “ohhhhh!” at the replay of Gillespie’s swung arm was only topped when both benches kicked off, Stelling in particular trying his best to level out his unruffled image with his clear wish to urge everyone on like a ringside punter.

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Monday 1 Manchester United miss a chance to go nine points clear, drawing 2‑2 at injury-hit Newcastle. Liverpool’s 3‑0 win over Bolton takes them third. “They’ve shown me in the last couple of weeks why they are down there,” says Alan Curbishley as West Ham crash 6‑0 at Reading, their third successive defeat. Wigan drop to 17th after a fifth straight loss, 3‑0 at home to Blackburn. Antti Niemi is hospitalised with a serious neck injury in Fulham’s 0‑0 draw with Watford. Derby’s 2‑1 win at Preston takes them to within three points of Championship leaders Birmingham, beaten by a 90th‑minute goal at Ipswich. Torquay are six points adrift in League Two after losing 1‑0 at Bristol Rovers.

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Wednesday 1 Chelsea, Ashley Cole and Jose Mourinho are found guilty of meeting in a hotel for immoral purposes and face fines totalling £600,000, with Chelsea also receiving a suspended three-point deduction; all will appeal. “The public don’t expect players to move just at the drop of a wallet,” warns David Dein. Darren Bent joins Charlton for £3 million.

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Some people are grateful that football pauses briefly in the summer, but not Cameron Carter. Join him on his quest to find meaning to his life on balmy days

Even those among us who are not numerologists can confidently state that years ending in odd numbers are inauspicious. This is because their summers are deserts of non-football. It is barely a month since Liverpool brought last season to a shocking close and already the days, especially the weekends, are feeling pitilessly long. There are three alternatives for the football fan between late May and August in 2005: skirmish like a seagull with a bin liner for any scraps of football-related activity; find another sport to take football’s place temporarily; or – and this is the big one – try to find another form of human activity that can fill up the time.

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Was Everton’s success was all down to David Moyes’s singing skills? Mark O'Brien explains how a warble in an American bar last summer became a song for Europe

Everton fans can be forgive a wry smile when the supporters of teams obsessed with playing in Europe use participation in the UEFA Cup or the Champions League as an explanation for their club’s poor performance in the Premiership. Or, to be more precise, why their club finished below Everton at the end of the 2004-05 season.

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