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The Autobiography of Ian Holloway
Green Umbrella, £16.99
Reviewed by Matt Nation
From WSC 250 December 2007

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Although Ian Holloway himself admits to being “not a particularly nice kid”, it doesn’t appear to have stopped his eye for a wrong ’un extending into adult life. After Ollie is dropped as a low-paid teenager at Bristol Rovers, Mike Channon attempts to console him by first by offering him £1,000 and then snatching it away at the last second. Three lines later, however, Channon is described as a “fantastic bloke”. Both Bobby Gould’s and Dave Bassett’s man-management skills are (once again) shown to be about as sensitive as a nipple wrench in the bogs, yet Ollie “likes” and “respects” his former gaffers. Only with Wally Downes does Ollie eschew praise with faint damnation in favour of a full-on, and fully deserved, kicking after the former Wimbledon man cracked wise about the new boy’s wife’s chemotherapy.

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Thursday 1 “I think I have arrived here at the perfect time,” says Andriy Shevchenko on joining Chelsea for £30 million. Arsenal are to be questioned over a loan payment made to their Belgian nursery club Beveren, which may have breached FIFA regulations. Ronnie Moore steps down as Oldham manager, to be replaced by John Sheridan.

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As his team get ready for life in League One, even John Earls can see the attraction of a league as unpredicatable as The Championship

With a fortnight left, everything in this league was already settled – automatic promotion, the play-off entrants and relegation. But this didn’t tell the whole story of a frequently absurd season. Reading were so good, Brighton so bad and everyone else so inconsistent that the other 22 clubs should have been told: “Come back next season and do it properly this time.”

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Wednesday 1 A fantastic night in the Premiership sees the big four all mess up. Arsenal lose 3‑2 at home to West Ham – Sol Campbell, at fault for two goals, is subbed at half‑time and promptly leaves the ground – though Thierry Henry does at least beat Cliff Bastin’s club league goalscoring record with his side’s first. Man Utd are beaten 4‑3 at Blackburn, for whom David Bentley gets a hat-trick, and have Rio Ferdinand sent off. Liverpool concede a late equaliser in a 1‑1 draw with Birmingham, who had been down to ten men for over an hour. Chelsea also lose a lead late on in a 1‑1 draw at Villa. Newcastle lose 3‑0 at Man City to a backdrop of “Souness out” banners. Mark Wright is to sue Peterborough for being sacked over alleged racist remarks.

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After Sheikhgate where next for Sven, and more importantly who next for the FA

So, Sven’s off, to the undisguised delight of his media detractors, who want him replaced with a tracksuited fusion of Henry V, the Duke of Wellington and Bomber Harris, who will spur the team on by sheer force of bellowing, in the dressing room and on the touchline.

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