Search: ' Mark Lawrenson'

Simon Tyers on how documentaries investigating football’s underworld are flattering to deceive

If making an impression is as much about what you don’t say as what you do, Martin Tyler gave a masterclass after Fernando Torres’ eye-rubbingly bad miss in the Manchester United-Chelsea match on September 18. After an “Oh no!” in the shock of the moment, Tyler couldn’t bring himself to elucidate about what we’d all just seen for a full five seconds. Hardly Pinter length, but by Sky Sports standards it was the sort of delay that would make nervous editors prepare an apology caption. Andy Gray would have shouted all over it. It was quite sweet, really.

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Some simple ways to make the 2011-12 season more palatable. Badge kissing, coloured boots and the the inanity of Mark Lawrenson all require immediate attention

Before we begin to list our hopes for the new season, it should be noted that nothing we ask for ever comes to pass, often because that would require adjustments to the Laws of the Game or to the Indecent Displays Act (1981). So there almost seems to be no point in, for example, expressing the hope that one day a referee will send off a player who makes the shushing or ear-cupping gesture to opposing fans when they’ve scored. Or that anyone over school age wearing a jester’s hat inside a football ground should be required to do community service, with the punishment extended if the wearer has a previous conviction for waving a giant foam hand.

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Cameron Carter traces the social history of Britain through 25 years of friendly faces presenting football programmes on TV

In 1986 presenters and pundits sat stiffly, in wife-selected jackets, behind desks, because the desk is the key western symbol of wisdom. In 2011 we have lounging gigglers like Alan Hansen and Mark Lawrenson who do not even wear neckties, or the man-child Jamie Redknapp who is allowed to wear expensive fashion-clothes and constantly interrupt his elders in a career-long attempt to prove his right to be heard. The desk has gone.

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Ever wanted to be a football pundit? Glen Wilson explains how easy it was to be mistaken for a virtual Andy Townsend

As Andy Gray took his final “boo” last month and emptied his desk of his telestrators and On The Buses DVDs, another much less prominent Andy also saw his media presence terminated. As Gray was exiting Sky Sports, Twitter was suspending the account of @AndyDTownsend, the satirical feed which had inadvertently found itself involved in the sexism scandals, having been mistaken by the Independent journalist Andy Herbert for the actual Andy Townsend.

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