Dear WSC
I’m sorry for having caused a misunderstanding with a line from my piece, Hardcore Football. Of course Derek Megginson is perfectly right (Letters, WSC No 111): Matthäus, Völler and Klinsmann were neither born in the Ruhr, nor have they ever played for a team from this region; actually, few places can be imagined that are further removed from the Ruhr than these gentlemen’s respective birthplaces. And that, I have to confess, was supposed to be my point.“Matthäus, Völler, Klinsmann . . . they all come from here, the Ruhr” was not meant to be taken literally; it functions as a metaphor (to avoid another complaint: yes, in highbrow lingo it’s a synecdoche). I thought a reader would stumble over this statement and, as a consequence, have a closer look at the err, subordinate clause, “the place where German football was spawned”. No matter how smart, suave and stinking rich these modern pros may be, they are still footballing descendants of the men with furry brows and callused hands. That’s what I wanted to say; and I thought it would work, because few people ran out and checked JFK’s birth certificate when he claimed, “Ich bin ein Berliner.” Alas, it’s not what you want to say, it’s what you say. Any misunderstanding in a text is always the writers;’ fault; metaphors are tricky bastards, and they have fooled better writers than me. We all make mistakes (Derek made one too: Pelé wasn’t born in Scarborough; he was born in Tres Caracoes, Brazil; it’s true that he spent the summers of his youth in Scarborough, with his uncle Simon Garfunkel, but he never would have qualified for Walter Winterbottom’s team). I promise to be less pretentious from now on.
Ulrich Hesse-Lichtenberger, Witten (birthplace of nobody), Germany (home to few)
Search: ' Ulrich Le Pen'
Stories
Dear WSC
I think it was William Shakespeare who once said “Don’t believe everything you read in newspapers. Or fanzines.” At any rate, unless someone corrects a few of the fallacies in Ulrich Hesse-Lichtenberger’s article about German football (WSC No 110), WSC readers will be suffering from some pretty serious misconceptions. How on earth can Ulrich claim “Matthäus, Klinsmann, Völler – they all come from the Ruhr”? Oh yeah, and Kenny Dalglish is a Cockney, I suppose? According to my copy of the 1996 edition of ‘The Sad Person’s Guide to the Date and Place of Birth of Every Famous German Footballer’, Rudi Völler was born in Hanau near Frankfurt and began his career with local team Offenbach Kickers. Lothar Matthäus comes from Herzogenaurach, a little place near Nuremberg whose other claim to fame is that it is the home of the Adidas empire. Jürgen Klinsmann is proud to be a Swabian and played for both major Stuttgart clubs before experiencing such huge success with Inter Cardiff and Scarborough. His career was resurrected by David Dein of Arsenal, but he later returned to Germany to play for Borussia 1898 Dudeldorf. Surely everyone ought to check his facts carefully before submitting anything to you for publication?
Derek Megginson, Scarborough
(birthplace of Bobby Charlton, Savo Milosevic and Pelé)