A small portion of despair and enlightenment delivered to your inbox every Friday
9 October 2015 ~
José Mourinho has called his £50,000 FA fine, for saying referees were afraid to give Chelsea penalties, a "disgrace". Surely he will be fined for that?
Badge of the week ~ Pasargad FC, Philippines
The Flying Wooden Duck is well known throughout the Philippines for being the harbinger of either good fortune or a death in the family, depending on how he’s feeling. Consequently, the general Filipino population is ambivalent about this particular figure. In folk lore, sightings of the Flying Wooden Duck lead to an almost unbearable period of apprehension simultaneously combined with eager anticipation. There is, perhaps understandably, a discernible jumpiness about the residents of a house over which he has flown.
Of course sometimes the appearance of the Flying Wooden Duck has led to both outcomes. In the popular novel, The Good Times and Bad Times of the Garcia Family With Some Notes on How Well They Maximise Interior Space, The Flying Duck is seen crossing over the Garcia house in the moonlight and an agony of waiting ensues, with none of the family able to sleep that night. In the morning, the family patriarch is found stone dead in his bed and the eldest son immediately inherits enough to embark on his lifelong dream of breeding homing ants. Another tale relates of a man who, having sighted the duck above his cottage, won solid a gold hat the following day at a meat raffle.
In his rush to claim the prize he tripped over a pig and was impaled on some early threshing machinery. So it’s a mixed bag, really, the Flying Wooden Duck. Pasargad use the duck’s image to suggest both the unpredictability of life and their recent home form. Cameron Carter
Not just a foul throw, more like an atrocious one.
Colin Murray yet to confirm whether he will honour his pledge.
Last week, we covered the mysterious Zlatan installation in Malmo. This week, he’s topped that with a gold record.
Interview interrupted by a topless Martin Skrtel. Would Jürgen Klopp approve?