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26 April 2013 ~
Corporate banker Anthony Fry is to be the new chairman of the Premier League. His appointment is a surprise as he had no previous connection with football. But as this makes him the exact opposite of his hapless predecessor, Sir Dave Richards, it might not be a bad thing.
Badge of the week ~ HNK Primorac Biograd na Moru, Croatia
HNK Primorac is a club that prides itself on a record of readiness, attention to detail and thoroughness of preparation. This comes from the town of Biograd na Moru itself, whose inhabitants are renowned all over Croatia for being innovators in the field of Domestic Inconvenience Avoidance. In this town resided the first person to turn garden furniture over in rainy weather in order to avoid wetness on the seat of the chairs for the next incumbent.
This began with one individual, an equity finance trader called Danislav Stanic, who noticed during a heavy rainfall that his garden chairs accumulated a small pool of water on their seats. The realisation coincided with him tripping on an LSD tab he had been keeping in the fridge to mark the tenth anniversary of buying the garden furniture in the first place. In his heightened state of awareness, he careered into the rain dressed only in a singlet and galoshes to turn the chairs upside down.
Little did he know that private householders, publicans and hoteliers all over the world would one day be following his example. Stanic also invented the act of fornication with a butter-lined glove but this is less overtly celebrated in the region. Cameron Carter
"There are lines you just can't cross, and he has crossed it today," said Graeme Souness of the Luis Suárez bite. Graeme would know all about crossing lines, of course.
If Robin van Persie is puzzled by the tweets he receives about telecommunications in India, this will explain why.
from Roy Cameron
"Patrice Evra creates Spotify playlists ahead of matches. Here's what got him into the zone for the Villa game. It wouldn't have worked for me, I must say."
from Ben Perry
"Gary Mills's heavily amended Wikipedia entry gets straight to the point."
from Matt Braddock
"Not sure Bing translator is up to speed."
from Matt Howell
"Spotted on the Twitter account of groundhopper @MoreheadTony, here's a photo of the glamorous raffle prizes on offer at Matlock v Ferriby."
Getting shirty Notable kits of yesteryear
Blyth Spartans home, 2005-07
Blyth Spartans began 2005-06 with a new kit manufacturer, Hummel, and main sponsor, Drager, for what would ultimately be the most successful season in the club's history. The German firm specialises in breathing apparatus for the fire services and diving industry and has long been a significant employer in the town. Drager took over from the Federation Brewery whose LCL lager brand adorned the Spartans' green and white shirt on and off for a decade; before that the magazine Viz had been one of the club's main backers.
Club legend Robbie Dale won the FA Pyramid top scorer award as his 37 goals helped drive Blyth to the Unibond Premier Division title. After a whirlwind start to the next season in the Conference North which saw Blyth lead the table, they would eventually finish in seventh place, narrowly missing out on the play-offs.
The manager at the time, Harry Dunn, was still in charge for FA Cup run of 2008-09 when Shrewsbury and Bournemouth were beaten before Blyth went out by a single goal to Sam Allardyce's Blackburn Rovers in the third round. Despite the club earning around £400,000 and widespread national exposure from their Cup exploits, they parted company with Dunn at the end of 2008-09 following a poor league performance. Mark Godfrey