2011

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16 December 2011 ~

With the Europa League draw imminent, Manchester City will be getting ready to launch their range of EL merchandise. Hurry to snap up the heavily discounted Champions League products – we particularly liked this "Ultimate Stage" T-shirt that commemorates the club's failure to progress beyond the group stage of the competition.

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9 December 2011 ~

Wily old campaigner Alex Ferguson knew his young Manchester United side had no chance of beating Barcelona to win this year's Champions League. So using all the cunning for which he is renowned, he switched to another competition mid-season. You can't buy that type of experience.

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2 December 2011 ~

With a few hours to go before the Euro 2012 draw, we can exclusively reveal what pundits will be saying about England's opponents. Teams from Eastern Europe will be well organised, the northern sides will relish a physical battle and the southern Europeans are unpredictable but can be world beaters on their day. As for Ireland, whatever they do, their fans be will be sure to have a party.

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25 November 2011 ~

It seems that Chelsea may be building a new stadium at Battersea Power Station. It is a listed building so they would have to keep the four immense chimneys. But then, Roman Abramovich will need somewhere to dump the failed managers.

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11 November 2011 ~

Today's Howl has been done in a rush as we have appointments this afternoon to get poppies tattooed on our chests. Suck on that, Sepp.

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18 November 2011 ~

Rio Ferdinand is among the major figures in English football who have criticised Sepp Blatter's claim that racism between players is not a problem. Surprisingly, however, there has been no comment from England captain John Terry. Perhaps it's not a subject he feels strongly about.

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4 November 2011 ~

To mark Alex Ferguson's 25th anniversary as manager of Manchester United we've been reflecting on his moments of charm, wit and fair-mindedness. It didn't take long.

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28 October 2011 ~

A few newspapers mentioned that John Terry would be opening a pet shop this week so his reasons for pulling out seem a little murky. We can only assume that the snakes didn't want to be associated with him.

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21 October 2011 ~

From Colonel Gaddafi's point of view, the worst thing about coming to a gory end yesterday was that it deprived him of a chance to watch this weekend's titanic, momentous, globe-spanning Manchester derby.

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14 October 2011 ~

Garry Cook has only been gone a few weeks and already he has a successor as the embodiment of crass corporate bluster in the Premier League. It's Liverpool's managing director Ian Ayre for his suggestion that clubs should be able to negotiate their own foreign TV deals. Ayre's proposal was quickly slapped down by other clubs, with the best response from the chairman who said "You won't get more money by killing the heart and soul of football in England". Making Dave Whelan sound like the voice of reason is quite an achievement.

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