THE HALF DECENT FOOTBALL MAGAZINE

A small portion of despair and enlightenment delivered to your inbox every Friday
9 October 2015 ~

Michel Platini's bid to be FIFA president received a boost this week. Most of the delegates who voted for Sepp Blatter in last summer's election are still in position. Platini's suspension over allegations of corruption will surely only strengthen his claims to be a worthy successor to Sepp

---

Porto150aBadge of the week ~ FC Porto
Most dragons or lions in heraldry are depicted rampant – keenly ready for combat, quiveringly poised, in the alert position generally. FC Porto’s dragon, on the other hand, presents as unmotivated, sedentary, insouciant. He appears in a recumbent position, not unlike a third year Cambridge undergraduate smoking a cheroot in his room while awaiting the other members of the Newtonian Physicists Gun Club. 

“Invicta” is the word we can discern on his witty red scarf, which means “It’ll Keep” in Latin. In the tableaus below the dragon we find two identical images of Benedita being knighted for her services to child millinery. Benedita was an inspirational figure in 19th century Portugal, an indefatigable woman who railed against the limitations imposed upon children’s headwear at that time. Often children in the small villages wore only bobble hats or sun hats, or, in some cases, no hat at all. It was Benedita who designed the first pre-school fascinator, creating a socio-political impetus that resulted in the first Child Hat Law of 1848.

FC Porto feature these two images as the club’s underlying philosophy is obviously to achieve, like the hat lady, but to do so while maintaining a healthy work-life balance, like lying on cushions blowing smoke rings. Cameron Carter

---

from Tom Lines
“Has a tweet from a football club ever raised such immediately intriguing questions?”

---

from Ingrid Ohlsson
“A mysterious installation appeared in Zlatan’s hometown of Malmo ahead of their Champions League tie with Real Madrid. It’s quite lifelike.”

---

A fan makes a surprise appearance in an Argentinian third division match

---

We’ve all done it. Ronnie Whelan forgets to delete his sponsor’s instructions before tweeting.

---

One of the many startling things about West Ham's general sale prices for their match against Chelsea is that "restricted view" tickets aren't even the cheapest. Presumably "Band 4" is outside the stadium.

---

Also in the news this week
Brendan sacked: Thierry reacts
Mechelen keeper saves three penalties
Braintree players shake hands with all their fans

Related articles

Old Too Soon, Smart Too Late: My Story by Kieron Dyer
with Oliver Holt Headline, £20Reviewed by Gavin BarberFrom WSC 377, July/August 2018Buy the book Kieron Dyer comes across in these pages as...
Hopes for 2018 ~ part one
Embed from Getty Images // A failed World Cup, underdogs having their day and free drinks during VAR decisions – WSC contributors on what...
The best and worst moments of 2017 ~ part two
Embed from Getty Images // From Lincoln’s triumphant season to Huddersfield’s heart-warming promotion, via Chelsea’s return to...