THE HALF DECENT FOOTBALL MAGAZINE

12 November ~ We've long suspected that Wayne Rooney flopped at the World Cup because the planet Saturn was draining his energy, something that could only have been countered by partnering him with a fellow Scorpio, Joe Cole. Now, finally, the astrologer Alan Ayre has produced a book explaining how the constellations can effect the game. This should be compulsory reading on FA coaching courses. Taken from the WSC Weekly Howl 

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