THE HALF DECENT FOOTBALL MAGAZINE

OxfordCity250Badge of the week ~ Oxford City
The paddling cow was a cow that escaped in Oxford in 1425 while being driven to market. The procedure was in those days for the first person on the scene of the mishap or offence to raise the hue and cry. If they failed to do so, they would be considered by the sheriff to be the cause of the incident. The cowherd on this occasion raised the hue, but failed to raise the cry. He would normally have raised them both at the same time but, after he had raised the hue, he got into a conversation with a chandler about a problem he was having getting wax out of a new rug and completely forgot about the cry.

Miscellaneous200Badge of the week ~ Miscellaneous SC, Botswana
This is what happens when a league uses up all the good names that everyone wanted and is left with a club without a name. In a hurry, the new club's directors did what everyone in a bureaucracy does when faced with categorising something complex quickly, they called the club Miscellaneous and promised to change it to something more apposite later. 

Pandan150Badge of the week ~ Pandan XIV, Brunei
For a long time in the nation of Brunei, short trousers imported from the west for sporting or leisure purposes were, owing to an inconsistency of measurements between Europe and south-east Asia, significantly smaller than anticipated. The players of Pandan were not the only ones to struggle with their new kit but, instead of sending them right back to the supplier like everyone else, Pandan's first chairman instructed his players to wear them anyway. 

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November issue available in shops and online

AlHussein150Badge of the week ~ Al Hussein Sports Club, Jordan
Al Hussein Sports Club came into existence after their founder, a share fisherman, was hypnotised by a storm petrel. Khalid Hussan, later to become first club president, was having a cigarette on deck in the dead of night when the diminutive bird alighted on the boat railing and cocked a gleaming eye his way. Lost in his own reverie - in his own words he was wondering at the time how to dry plates while his wife washed up without looking inadequate - Hussan paid no heed to the bird at first, but then realised he had been staring into its beady eye for several minutes. 

Rebels150aBadge of the week ~ Rebels FC, British Virgin Islands
There are some things one's mind jolts to instantly on hearing the word "rebel". One is of course, Marlon Brando in The Wild One. If I recall the dialogue correctly: Young lady: "What are you rebelling against Johnny?" Marlon Brando: "What've you got?" Young lady: "Chlamydia." Marlon Brando: "I'm rebelling against chlamydia."