THE HALF DECENT FOOTBALL MAGAZINE

Magnificent names- any more you've come across?

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11 May 2012 12:27 #663140 by Geoffrey de Ste. Croix

With apologies to our Dutch OTFers but after umpteen years in the Lowlands, I still find that the Dutch name is the gift that keeps on giving.

In an otherwise depressing report on the rise in domestic bankruptcies and increasing household debt in the Netherlands, the spokeswoman for the NVVK, an organisation for debt management was interviewed- her name: Joke de Kock.

Fantastic, but I don't think my all time favourite Dutch name will ever be beaten.

I wonder if he ever bothers going to English speaking countries any more, such must be his tedium as passport control try to stifle their laughter.

Has anyone come across any names to beat those two?

And of course I'll be delighted to hear about any anglo-saxon/celtic names which make other nationalities roar with laughter.

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11 May 2012 12:33 #663146 by Nurse Duckett

Not Dutch, but whilst working at a multinational corporation I came across an American chap on the email system rejoicing in the name of Randy Lovelady.

Not sure randy has the same meaning in USA-land, but hats off to him.

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11 May 2012 12:43 #663153 by mews

I have a slim volume about unusual names ,cant find it at the mo.
Im sure there is a Turkish general from years gone by called Mustapha Cunt or summit.
Id fight for him/her.

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11 May 2012 12:50 #663159 by Sits

I always like the name of the American diver, Misty Hymen.

And obviously you come across the occasional Michael Hunt now and then.

So to speak.

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11 May 2012 12:51 #663161 by Slightly Brown

My gran’s name was Marion Scott-Wallace Macbeth Reid, which is only a few Mc's away from being the most Scottish name ever. Not especially funny, mind, but there you go.

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11 May 2012 12:52 #663162 by Ginger Yellow

Just learned this one from a podcast this morning: baseball player Wonderful Terrific Monds III .

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11 May 2012 13:11 #663170 by The Exploding Vole

I've posted this before.



I don't remember anyone giggling at his name at the time he was playing.

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11 May 2012 13:19 #663174 by Sits

Of course American sportspeople who change their names shouldn't count, but still:

Metta World Peace

Chad Ochocinco


And this guy didn't need to change his name (I know he's been on another thread recently):

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11 May 2012 13:47 #663201 by evilC

I wonder if he'll call his daughter 'Fanny'?

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11 May 2012 13:51 #663203 by evilC

For American Football names, the ones that amused me - partly because they were both on a New York Giants defensive unit in the late 80s, I believe - were (I think) Barry Ard and Terry Kinard. No apostrophes needed!

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11 May 2012 14:10 #663211 by Jimmy Bignutz

mews wrote:

I have a slim volume about unusual names ,cant find it at the mo.
Im sure there is a Turkish general from years gone by called Mustapha Cunt or summit.
Id fight for him/her.

There was certainly a Mustafa Bumin

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11 May 2012 14:19 #663219 by JVL

A Chinese translation agency we work with has a project manager who revels in the name of Alphonsus Wang.

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11 May 2012 18:21 - 11 May 2012 18:27 #663349 by Desperately Seeking

I used to have a partner called Eggie Kock

Last Edit: 11 May 2012 18:27 by Desperately Seeking.
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11 May 2012 18:23 #663352 by WOM

I'm working with a girl right now whose name is Tuyet. It's pronounced 'Twit'.

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11 May 2012 19:29 #663383 by brian potter
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11 May 2012 19:30 #663384 by brian potter

Jimmy Bignutz wrote:

mews wrote:
I have a slim volume about unusual names ,cant find it at the mo.
Im sure there is a Turkish general from years gone by called Mustapha Cunt or summit.
Id fight for him/her.

There was certainly a Mustafa Bumin

I used to work for a high street bank where one of the customers was Mustafa Kok.

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11 May 2012 20:13 #663393 by Rustic charm abounds

There was a Swedish bloke in my wife's old office in London called Urban Persson, which is not fnarr-worthy but always struck me as funny, in a does-exactly-what-it-says-on-the-tin kind of way.

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11 May 2012 20:22 #663395 by via vicaria

One of my clients at my last job had two excellently-named employees, who sadly I never got to deal with directly. One was a 'Beena Wankar', the other a George Nazi. He was relatively high up really, he googles pretty well

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11 May 2012 20:34 #663399 by erwin

mews wrote:

Im sure there is a Turkish general from years gone by called Mustapha Cunt or summit.

There was a character in a strip in a Beano annual (or it might have been The Beezer, or Topper) called Mustapha Fag.

My mum used to go and get unwanted facial hair removed by a lady called Esme Danks ... which is not at all funny - I just like the sound of the name.

My brother sent a letter to David Coleman pretending he was doing a university thesis on commentating, and could he interview him (DC was a joke hero for my brother and his mates). He declined via his secretary, one Elsie MacKintosh. My brother always swore that David had cottoned on, and was spoofing him back.

It's been mentioned on here before, but Sporting Braga's goalkeeper is Quim (short for Joaquim). It's pronounced +/- like /keem/, though.

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