A small portion of despair and enlightenment delivered to your inbox every Friday
2 May 2008 ~

Anyone looking out for unusual football items on Ebay should keep their eyes peeled for a letter of protest against Sven's dismissal as Man City manager. Defender Richard Dunne has apparently been collecting signatures for it this week. Thaksin knows how to turn a profit so expect to see it listed at quite a high reserve – he might even add his own signature as a bonus.

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Badge of the week
Germinal Beerschot Antwerpen's badge marks the exact moment when the footballing bear of Antwerp halted a match to tell everyone about this really funny thing that happened to him only the other day. The two-headed eagle is showing that wild, cackling laughter is always the best way to respond to a joke told by an 800 pound ursus arctos. Or it's the sort of unsatisfactory design compromise that often happens as a result of a merger. The bear came from the original badge of Beerschot, who had been Belgian league champions seven times before the Second World War, on which he was surrounded by acorns with no football in sight. The eagle belonged to Germinal Ekeren, a small club from the north Antwerp suburbs who fused with their better supported but bankrupt neighbours in 1999. The new club has since won the Belgian cup in 2004-05.

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Later this month, David Beckham is to make an appearance on Sesame Street where he will explain why he likes the word “Persistence”. What word would you like to hear American children being taught to say in that accent? We'd go for “Grumble“, “Nudge“ or “Wall”.

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Spotting players
from Alison Riley
“I met Frank McAvennie once at a wedding reception in Penzance, Cornwall. While I was alone at the bar he asked if he could buy me a drink and, knowing his reputation, I accepted. He was really quite chatty and nice and seemed very interested in me right up until my boyfriend returned from the toilet. Frank sort of lost focus then and soon slipped away to join his friends. But I got a free drink out of it and his hair was at its luxuriant peak so I felt blessed. On reflection, it’s not much of an anecdote but it does qualify as an encounter.”

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Historic Football Websites No 4 ~ HTFC-World
Ask football fans to think of the first crap fixture which pops into their head and many will come straight out with Grimsby Town. Away. In midweek. In the first round of the Football League Trophy.” After that intro, the pictorial match report of Grimsby v Huddersfield at HTFC-World just gets better, illustrated throughout with captioned players and fans pouring out the morbid humour necessary to endure the long march to (and the long match in) Cleethorpes. Each report is a 12-day labour of love, according to the site’s lone creator, so not every game is featured, but those available are always worth the read. First featured as a WSC Top Five Site back at Christmas 2001, HTFC-World is now in its ninth year, but remains one of the freshest and most original webzines. Ian Plenderleith

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This week in history ~ Premier League, May 1, 1999



Results

Arsenal’s 1-0 win over Derby the day after took them a point clear at the top but a defeat by the same score at Leeds in their 37th match proved decisive. Six English players featured in Arsène Wenger's regular starting line-up – the entire defence plus Ray Parlour – with another three in the squad (Steve Bould, Matthew Upson and Stephen Hughes).

Man Utd's victory over Villa was clinched by a 30-yard free kick from David Beckham. They took the title by a point thanks to a 2-1 defeat of Spurs at Old Trafford. Dwight Yorke finished joint top League scorer on 18 goals alongside Michael Owen and Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink, then with Leeds.

Southampton's victory over Leicester was the first of three successive wins that kept them up by five points. During the run-in, striker Marian Pahars, “the Michael Owen of Latvia”, scored three goals in his first four starts for the club.

Charlton and Blackburn both went down. After Rovers' next match, a 2-1 defeat at home to already relegated Forest, manager Brian Kidd complained that his team contained “rubber dinghy men” who were evading their responsibilities.

Kidd's predecessor, Roy Hodgson, had been sacked in December with the team having taken one point from seven games. Results briefly improved under Kidd but no wins in the final eight matches sent the team down. The relegated squad contained five players who had been with Blackburn when they won the League four years earlier.

Harry Redknapp's West Ham had three players sent off in their home thrashing by Leeds and their next match was a 6-0 defeat at Everton. But a fifth-place finish was their best since coming third in 1985-86. Paolo Di Canio scored four in 12 matches after signing from Sheffield Wed in February. His last match for Wednesday had been against Arsenal five months earlier, after which he was banned for shoving referee Paul Alcock.

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A few weeks ago we mentioned the psychic Dean “Midas” Maynard, who was helping Ashington’s battle against relegation from the Northern League Division One. Those of you on Dean’s wavelength will already know that the club have now stayed up after four wins in their last eight games. This was an impressive run as these were all away fixtures, the club having had to quit their Portland Park ground in February. So expect to see some heartfelt testimonials from Ashington officials on Dean’s website alongside Damon Scott, runner-up in Britain’s Got Talent, who says: “Dean knew things he couldn’t possibly have known.” Those in need of help should click here

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WSC Trivia ~ No 13
A fair amount of junk mail drops through the WSC letterbox. Mostly generic office stuff – photocopiers, watercoolers, credit cards – rather than football-related. As any marketing expert will tell you, the more personalised the message, the better the response. Except, of course, when the intended recipient 1) has never worked here and 2) is dead. Back in 1998, we were surprised to receive mailshot addressed to Helenio Herrera, the Argentinian who won the European Cup as manager of Inter in 1964 and 1965, among numerous other successes. Some keen young marketeer had obviously had the idea of using a copy of WSC to find some names of people to contact, and hadn't been paying much attention as they took the name from the introduction to Helenio's obituary.

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Stickipedia  
A mine of information constructed from sticker cards
Don Givens, Neuchatel Xamax Football 87
Irish striker Don Givens was top scorer in the QPR team that finished Division One runners-up, only one point behind Liverpool, in 1975-76. Five years later, in his last League match, he missed the 89th-minute penalty that would have saved Sheffield United from being relegated to Division Four – opponents Walsall duly won 1-0 and stayed up by a point. Wisely deciding on a change of scene, the 32-year-old Givens embarked on a new career in Switzerland where he proved to be a big success. Converted to a central defender, he won a championship with Neuchatel in 1986-87 and had a spell as Swiss national-team manager before returning to Ireland where he is now the Under-21 coach. He might even risk the odd scouting trip to Bramall Lane.

from Tim Manns
“Last week’s Stickipedia about Gerry Hitchens imitating Sir Alf Ramsey's distinctive intonation reminded me of a story I once read concerning England arriving in Mexico for the 1970 World Cup. Alf was famous for his dislike of all forms of media. As the group left the arrivals hall he encountered a radio reporter who thrust a microphone in his face with the words ‘Sir Alf Ramsey you are live on Mexican radio’, to which Alf replied, ‘Ho no I f*ckin’ hain't’ and stalked away.”

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League table courtesy of www.statto.com: the place to go for football stats & odds comparison – English & Scottish stats from 1871 plus European & International

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