A small portion of despair and enlightenment delivered to your inbox every Friday
3 October 2008 ~
You’re nobody these days unless you’re suing West Ham. Today it is the turn of Bolton chairman Phil Gartside who is brooding over his side’s 3-1 defeat by the Hammers in May 2007 in which Carlos Tevez scored twice. Bolton subsequently finished seventh, two points outside a UEFA Cup spot. “There is an argument to say we can claim three points from West Ham,” said Gartside. “It cost us £700,000 because that was one place in the league.” Our case will revolve around the WSC Sheffield United Relegation Avoidance Special, featuring contributions from a host of Sheffield-born luminaries including Jarvis Cocker, Joe Cocker, Michael Palin and Roy Hattersley – who contributed a typically perceptive 15,000-word thinkpiece. It had been sent to the printers but had to be scrapped when United lost to Wigan on the final day of the season while Carlos Tevez secured West Ham’s win at Old Trafford. You can’t put a price on our disappointment but we’re in for £100,000 minimum.
---
 Badge of the week
CS Tiligul-Tiras Tiraspol play in the top tier of the Moldovan League and their badge, not merely an iconic list of the town’s former industries, has a magical story to tell. The main picture shows, to the left, a wild young woman, beset by three ravens, running in a blind passion she-knows-not-where. To the right, a man sits brooding guiltily in a wicker chair, possibly awaiting the woman’s return. The east European folk tale alluded to tells the story of a poor woodcutter. When his wife presented him with a new-born baby girl, the woodcutter feigned delight, only to wander off into the forest with his daughter that very night and leave her there, claiming she had been kidnapped by bandits. The infant was found by three ravens who reared her as their own. However, the girl, as soon as she came of age, was not thankful to the birds. The ravens grew angry at this and chased the girl all over the country so that she had no peace, which is also true of every neighbourhood she passed into. Some say you can hear her heart-rending cries when the wind is still in the trees, while others say that it’s probably a bird you can hear, going on the law of averages. It’s not a nice story, and it may not be true, but the close study of this crest will definitely give opposition players something to think about whenever there’s a lull in play. Cameron Carter
---
When, you may well have asked yourself, are Europe’s top footballers going to address the issue of childhood obesity? Just as we had to begun to despair, they have got together and come up with Eat For Goals!, a picturebook featuring recipes and “cheerful quotes” from many top players. Steven Gerrard, who has contributed his signature dish, Aromatic Sea Bream, says the recipes will help children “to cook and eat like champions”. The EU’s Health Commissioner, Androulla Vassiliou, was a little more brusque when addressing an audience of children at the launch: “We don’t want you to be fat when you grow up.” Surprisingly they didn’t ask noted restauranteur Jamie Carragher to contribute, although it’s an issue he’s known to be interested in. As the Liverpool Echo reported recently: “Having seen a news item about an eight-year-old child who weighed 15 stones he thought: ‘That’s got to be wrong.’”
---
from Alan Shore
"If Scottish football writer Chick Young ever sees his own Wikipedia entry he’ll want to suggest an amendment." 
---
Should you be looking for an unusual gift, several footballers have donated signed boots to a charity auction on behalf of the Roy Castle Lung Cancer Foundation. Bidding closes on October 10. You’ll notice that, alone among the football people, John Aldridge hasn’t donated old boots but a pair of (unsigned) black leather shoes worn at “many special awards ceremonies”. These are currently going for one-tenth the cost of Sir Cliff Richard’s worn trainers (“hopefully not too smelly!”). This doesn’t seem right at all. Bid now and bid often.
---
WSC Trivia ~ No 35
“New Media – New Arse” is stencilled on a wall adjacent to the WSC office. What can it mean? It might be a critical comment on the main local industry – this is Shoreditch, though some distance from the Hoxton epicentre – or it could be advertising a company called New Arse, named in the same clumpily ironic spirit as Mad Fashion Bitch, the dress shop on the nearby high street. Is it suggesting that an involvement in new media can in some way reinvigorate your bum? This seems unlikely as our experience of the online world so far is that it involves a lot of sitting down.
---
Stickipedia
A mine of information constructed from sticker cards
 Harry Williams, Australia Bergmann Fussball WM, 1974
Harry Williams was the first of the three Aborigine footballers to date to have played at international level for Australia. A left-back, he was first capped on a 1970 tour which included games in Central America, Asia and Europe. Four years on, he was included in Australia’s World Cup finals squad and played as a late substitute in their last group match against Chile. Williams was brought up by foster parents in the Sydney suburb of St George where he played for the local football team after turning down approaches from rugby league clubs. He retired from playing aged 39 in 1989 and now works as an administrator for indigenous communities in Canberra. He has also lent his name to an annual tournament, the Harry Williams Cup, competed for by Aborigine youth teams in New South Wales.
---
Contribute to the Weekly Howl
Spotted a footballer this week? Seen any Wikipedia vandalism? Read a ludicrous football story in your local paper? Anything else you'd like to get off your chest? We'd like to hear from you ~ drop us a line at
This email address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it
|
WEEKLY HOWL 
