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Search: ' Simon Clifford'

Stories

From the archive ~ It’s time to admit football scenes in movies don’t work

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Never mind Escape To Victory, Mike Bassett or Jimmy Grimble – where’s our Raging Bull, our This Sporting Life? Even a Seabiscuit would do

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Flicks to kick

Rob Hughes wonders why so many football-related dramas fail to strike the right tone, especially in their action scenes

Lord knows they’ve tried. Ricky Tomlinson as England manager. Sean Bean tanking around in a Sheffield United strip. Sylvester Stallone between the sticks. Even Adam Faith as pint-sized proprietor of – oh yes – Leicester Forest (from a script by Jackie Collins, no less). All of them as inept, unconvincing and downright embarrassing as each other. So just why is it that films about football never work? Certainly not through lack of an audience. It’s a sport, lest we forget, adored by millions the world over, one with its own in-built dramatic arc. A ready-made fantasy in which slumdogs really can become superstars. Never mind Mike Bassett or Jimmy Grimble. Where’s our Raging Bull, our This Sporting Life? Even a Seabiscuit would do.

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Six appeal

Steve Wilson recalls a time when the biggest names in football turned out for a game of six-a-side. How come it never caught on?

Imagine that the Masters Football tournaments that help fill the void each summer were played during the season. Now imagine that, instead of the best-supported sides being regionally invited to knock together a roster of paunchy, balding alumni, each of the 20 Premier League clubs sent along a squad padded out with first team regulars. Madness? By today’s standards, perhaps, but back in the 1980s it was a regular, and entertaining, occurrence.

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One foot wonders

Ever wondered how someone on £100,000 a week can have a “wrong” foot? Tom Green investigates the case for everything being all right with the left, as well as with the other one…

In an age of ProZone and FIFA coaching badges, one significant aspect of football technique appears to be overlooked: for some reason, right up to the very highest level, it seems acceptable to be one-footed.

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November 2005

Tuesday 1 Chelsea’s 1‑0 Champions League defeat at Real Betis is apparently their worst performance under José: “The first half was too bad to be true.” Liverpool lead the group after a 3‑0 win over Anderlecht, during which the visitors’ Nenad Jestrovic is sent off for racially abusing Momo Sissoko. Rangers can still progress despite a 2‑2 draw in Bratislava against Artmedia. It emerges that a Roy Keane interview for MUTV in which he heavily criticised team‑mates was not broadcast on Sir Alex’s insistence. Luton’s 4‑0 defeat at runaway Championship leaders Sheffield Utd is made worse by the news that plans for a new ground are to be scrapped. Mike Newell is unhappy with his board: “These people have been in charge for 18 months, so why has it taken them 18 months to find out they can’t build a stadium?” Millwall are four points adrift at the foot following a 2‑1 defeat at Burnley. Peter Shirtliff is named Mansfield manager.

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