It took a few months, but I finally sat through a non-sport programme made by Sky. I forget the details but it had "Britain's" in the title, and consisted of lots of people talking about fights in pubs as if they were a pleasure on a par with Venetian painting.

Is it always this bad? If so, why? Don't American cable channels make the odd good show? Has satellite telly in Britain ever made a good show? What's the best ever, Danny Dyer's Real Football Factories?

Presumably if the licence fee went (not impossible) would we get any good programmes made at all?